To leash or not to leash children is an oft-raised question. Is it truly nobler to spurn leashes and, perchance, your child will do no wrong? Or is it far wiser to leash them, and avoid a sea of troubles, but suffer the scorn of outraged strangers and the humiliations parental guilt is capable of self-inflicting? – William Shakespeare (updated and misquoted)
While the use of leashes on children seems to be declining, the subject continues to be of great interest. Type “children-leashes” into Google and up come 48 million responses, mostly from parents, educators, pediatricians and psychologists. Many responses are detailed and passionate. Here are some representative ones:
Don’t use the word ‘leash’. Call it a harness, halter, tether – or even an umbilical cord. These sound more humane.”
“Expect strangers to elbow their companions, point a finger in your direction and smile. Expect other strangers to frown in disbelief, with an occasional one telling you, ‘I leash my dog, you leash your kid’ or ‘Next, you’ll teach your child, sit, stay, roll over.’ Say ‘thank you for your advice’ – and do what you think best.”
Likely, children are more comfortable on a leash than walking with their arms yanked above their shoulder and their hands tightly held. Ditto for being shackled into a stroller.”
“Leashes are just what the doctor ordered for children with hyperactivity and sensory issues. Leashes allow them to move about safely while also allowing them to exercise.’
“Leashes save lives – mine. I have a bad back. My daughter is overweight. I am tall and must bend to the side to hold her hand. It hurts. My back hurts even more when she wants to be carried. Fortunately, she loves her leash. Go figure!”
“Leashes are no-brainers for parents with two toddlers. Most such parents have experienced the nightmare of both kids suddenly bolting in different directions with you only able to chase one at a time! Leashes are available that attach two kids to one leash, freeing one hand for other purposes.”
“Our world is not built for toddlers. Even places that are supposedly “for kids,” like zoos or amusement parks are so overstimulating and crowded that a visit there with a toddler is overwhelming. The leash allows you take a wiggly, impulsive firecracker of a human out into a big world that’s designed for predictable adults. But to those who leash: I salute you.”
“I lost my toddler at an airport. When we reunited, the terror in his eyes made me a ‘leasher.’”
“What kind of people are we that we put leashes on our kids? Dogs get more respect. I don’t care how uncontrollable children are. Haven’t these parents heard of books on improving their parenting skills? I feel like running up to these parents and slapping them. Leashes convey an inappropriate message by using physical force instead of words to keep children under control.”
“Leashing approaches child abuse, stunting curiosity, making children objects of ridicule, destroying their self-esteem…”
“Many types of leashes are available. Some can be extended and retracted. Leashes attach to children’s’ wrists, special vests, or backpacks. Some backpacks are shaped as cartoon characters. Check the internet.”
“Parents should ask themselves whether they have well-thought-out motives for leashing. Is it because their children are excessively impulsive or have special needs? Or is it because the parents have anxieties and don’t trust themselves to keep their child safe?”
“Does the leash ‘respect’ the fact that a toddler’s impulse control is not well-developed? Or does the leash ‘disrespect’ the toddler – and emphasizes the child’s subordinate status in the world?”
“My pediatrician suggested I get a leash. I dislocated my son’s arm twice. Dislocation occurs at the elbow when children twist a tightly held arm to go in a different direction.”
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My conclusion: All “opinions” on leashing young children are hearsay; I could not find a scholarly study. Using leashes occasionally for short periods of time, to “prevent a sea of troubles” is a reasonable strategy.
