I recently received this email: “Dear Dr. Neumann: Do you think it’s OK to place a leash on my 20-month old daughter? I use it mostly for travel, especially at airports and amusement parks, but also at malls. What an attention-getter! Some strangers tell me that leashing children is cruel and stunts curiosity and independence while others compliment me for giving her freedom to move about.” – Signed, L.N.
What do I think? Honestly, I never gave it much thought. But the subject intrigued me. So I did what most people nowadays do when they want to learn about something: I Google’d it. Amazingly, there are 342,000 entries for children/leashes, many with extremely emotional opinions, both pro and con, and both wise and other-than-wise. I scanned hundreds of the entries and discussed this “dilemma” with some pediatricians and a psychologist. Here are some opinions from the web. At the end is my “expert” opinion now that I am a know-it-all on the subject.
- “Likely, children are far more comfortable on a leash than spending hours walking around with their arm yanked above their shoulder and their hand tightly held by an adult.”
- “Parents who leash their children should either be shot or beaten to a bloody pulp. So I have started P.A.C.O.L. – People against Children on Leashes. We intend to put a stop to this embarrassment!!!! No longer will children’s self-esteem be put to shame. Leashes are meant for animals, not humans.”
- “Leashes give children a sense of freedom while providing security. Leashes can be extended (in parks) and retracted (in crowded places). A short leash in a grocery store attached to the mother’s wrist allows her to reach for products or read labels without worrying that someone will snatch her child out of the basket. And a leash can save a child’s life in a parking lot or around bodies of water. Small children are not tall enough to be seen by a motorist backing a car out.”
- “My pediatrician suggested I get a leash after I twice dislocated my son’s arm while walking with him. Dislocation occurs at the elbow. Once it happened when I held his hand tightly and he suddenly twisted to go in another direction; the other time he fell while I was still holding his arm. I had to go to the doctor to reset his elbow.”
- “Leashes come in a wide variety of designs. There are simple wrist versions with a Velcro strap that attaches to the child’s wrist and is connected to a retractable plastic device that the parent holds. And there are harness-types of restraints that slip over the shoulders, around the chest and back and then attach to the same type of handheld device. Many harnesses are backpacks shaped in the form of a cartoon character.”
- “An often overlooked and inexpensive type of leash for children can be found, yes, in pet stores. Large size web dog collars with matching leashes are sturdy, color-coordinated and long lasting. They come in a variety of sizes and styles that many parents will actually match with favorite outfits.”
- “Leashes are a no-brainer for parents of multiple toddlers. A challenging moment is when their desire to explore the world surpasses their ability to recognize danger, between the ages of 1 and 3, when they become mobile. Almost every parent of multiples experiences situations where the kids simultaneously take off in separate directions while the parent stands frozen in horror, not knowing which one to chase after first!”
- “Leashes save lives – mine. I have a bad back and my daughter is overweight. I am very tall and I have to bend to the side to hold her hand. It hurts. And it hurts when I have to carry her. Like most children she wants to be picked up at times. But she likes her leash and it reduces the number of times I must pick her up compared to when she is walking alone or in her stroller.”
- “Are leashes any more restraining than keeping kids strapped into a stroller? My kid is extremely active and fights to get out of the stroller but seems fairly happy with his leash. Leashes provide freedom to roam around, but I control the boundaries. I say “thank you for your advice” to busybodies – and then do what I think is best.”
- “What kind of people have we turned into that we put our children on leashes? That’s like treating them no better than dogs. I don’t care how restless and uncontrollable they are. Haven’t these parents heard of books on improving their parenting skills? I feel like running up to these parents and slapping them. Leashes convey an inappropriate message by using physical force instead of words to keep children under control.”
My opinion? Dear L.N: Ignore the dirty looks, finger pointing and lectures. It is hard to imagine that leashes inflict psychological trauma on children. And leashes greatly improve safety.
